Almost everybody compares themself to others. You can always find something you wish you had. It´s human nature; it starts in school by comparing grades and toys others have and judging looks and styles of someone else. But does this even matter? Isn´t it better to stop comparing yourself to others?
Why comparing is bad?
Nowadays, most people use social media; the place where comparison with others is common practice. Wow look at the nice car he has, I want this amazing relationship she has, his job would make me happy, how can I get this body?
Of course, you want the wonderful lifestyle of others. You may think this is what I want, how can I be like that. But what really happens, you will feel miserable you will become demotivated and discouraged and ready to give up all your dreams and goals. And for what to live another’s person’s life. Do you think this will make you happy?
No, you won´t find joy in being someone else because you don´t see the pain, hustle, the struggle, the sacrifice, and the natural talent they may have. The only thing most people notice is the perfect life someone has without knowing their inside characteristics.
There will always be someone more successful than you, but this leads to even more lack of confidence and self-esteem, which makes you only get more frustrated. Every time you compare yourself, the gaps between the ideal situation and where you now get bigger. When you do things you don´t like just to be someone else it will rob all your joy.
You don´t want to be a follower for the rest of your life; it will only disappoint you. You have to realize you can´t have another life but your own.
How to stop comparing yourself to others?
Every time you start catching yourself comparing to others, try to make yourself aware of it. Think about these activities like endless scrolling through social media, driving through the wealthy neighborhood that gives you the feeling of disconnection and jealousy, and makes yourself remember what emotions you had before doing that.
You can make a list of what you do that brings the negative effect of comparison. Try to avoid these experiences because they waste your time.
And no money isn´t the key to happiness it provides an only temporary boost of joy. Chasing pleasure above everything else isn´t healthy either; its the central value of drug addicts, which often makes more anxious and depressed. And remember the seamlessly perfect life many present on the outside won´t show what goes on behind closed doors.
Better look at all the things you have and not the things you want. Show more gratitude for what is good in your life and for what you have. It will help to stop comparing yourself with others, and you also become less envious of them.
It would be better if you found healthier values to judge your achievements because our values are more important than success when it comes to happiness. Choose values like honesty, friendliness, something that you can only decide to do.
Everybody has in life ups and downs. When you feel miserable, you often compare yourself to others, how much better their life is. You start blaming someone or something else for your circumstances and problems you encounter. This won´t make you feel better. But what matters is how you respond to different situations. When you take 100 % responsibility for your own life, you can realize and work on your mistakes and problems. This is what makes you feel better, and will you help to grow and improve yourself to be better prepared for the future.
Yes, sometimes it isn´t in your hand what others do to make you feel bad, but even from these people, you can learn. The best you can do is only to compare yourself with other persons when you need inspiration. Do this by listening and talking to these people to create ideas of your own. And start learning and growing through these experiences but don´t follow their footsteps.
Look out for the things you can what is your strength, what are beliefs that keep you healthy and make you happier. Focus on these things, be it the joyful struggle or a healthy relationship or adventures you want to make everything else is a pointless distraction. No one is better at being you than you.
So pick what’s important to you who inspires you and ignore the rest. You may even discover a new passion and create a more fulfilling life.
When you are based in reality and helpful to society and showing kindness, it will have an immediate effect on your overall well being. It may is easier to judge others to make yourself feel better, but hating on others just to experience short term joy is a way of hiding your insecurities.
However, boosting others up will make you feel more positive about yourself. People sense if you show a positive attitude and may put their guard down. Be open to their concerns and problems they share with you and try to provide helpful and uplifting advice.
The only time you should compare yourself is against the progress you have made and when you learn from others to improve yourself. You can become the best version of yourself if you focus on becoming better than who you were yesterday.
Stop chasing things that don´t make you happy. Choose what you really care about and develop a more constructive approach to work, love, and life itself.
Start telling your own story by not comparing it with other stories. You will find your own path as long as you show the courage to disagree and go against the status quo.
When do you stop comparing and start being the best version of yourself?